were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
