Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
