party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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