Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize