I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
