fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
