Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
