And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
