And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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