my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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