..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
