thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
