She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
