you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
We are all done wearing pants today
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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