I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
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