fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
