my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
