i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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