get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
