I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Randomize
