am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
