i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
