I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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