I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Just cropdusted the office
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
