i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
