Kiss
Puke
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
