I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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