Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
