Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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