He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
