Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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