check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize