thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
