I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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