Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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