marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
