Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
