I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
what day is it and did you see me today?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
