Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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