Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
