Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
