I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
my sisters under your porch take her home
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
