Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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