he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize