yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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