yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Randomize
