i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Me too!
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I think my moral compass just broke
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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