return my video game
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
