its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
