i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize