i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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